By now, you know the STORY of the Mother Letter Project. See the FAQs for more information.
Every Friday, we would like to post a guest’s Mother Thoughts. Today’s guest is Danielle from Extraordinary Mommy. She runs an incredible site, encouraging moms and telling them that they are exactly who their children need.
Send an email to motherletter@gmail.com if you’re interested in posting your own Mother Thoughts, whether or not you’re a mother.
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I was lucky. It only took 10 minutes of pushing for me to bring my daughter into the world nearly 5 years ago. And for my son, well, I pushed once and then laughed him out. True story. The doctor had me pull him out on to my stomach.
Both moments were pure magic. This itty-bitty being goes from keeping you up at night while using your kidneys as a punching bag to a real life baby.
I thought I was prepared. I had read the books. I scavenged for every tibit of information that just might make me a ‘good Mommy’. I knew what to expect for feeding and sleeping, for dressing and bathing, for cooing and loving, and even for crying (for both of us).
But there was something missing from all of the literature I read, the websites I searched, the mommys I chatted with. No one told me, as my sweet ones exited the safety of my body and entered my physical world, they would actually take my heart with them.
My heart no longer resides within the safe confines of my chest. It is walking around, beating and strong, having taken the form of two small people.
I am certain the sound of my own heartbeat is strongest when they are near. I know the pace of my heart quickens as they experience joy and sorrow. The pulsing of fear when I feel compelled to protect them can almost drown out any sound – much like standing just off shore – surrounded by the strongest waves in the ocean.
As Delaney learned to crawl and Cooper took his first steps, my heart toddled right along with them. When Delaney steps out of my car this coming September to begin her first day of kindergarten, my heart, too, will jump from the car, give a quick wave and slam the door. Without that heart beating close by, I will hold my breath until she returns.
As the moments of our life tick by, I recognize Motherhood to be a journey. A joyful journey, but a challenging one. It is part sacrifice, part chaos, part thrill and all privilege.
It is an experience I often have difficulty articulating. Mere words don’t seem heavy enough to convey the weight of responsibility and bliss that come with being a Mommy.
I do know this – it is an experience unlike any other. And that heart you have so often referenced in your life – whether it broke with the loss of a boyfriend, or beat right out of your chest before a big presentation, or stopped that Halloween night when your friends pounced out from behind a bush and bellowed ‘boo’ – that heart no longer belongs to you alone.
{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
Thank you for having me as a guest! Proud to be supporting what you are doing!
What a great project. I am a parent as well - and the birth of my children were amazing milestones in our lives.
I cannot tell you how much I love this. Thank you SO much for your contribution. This was a great way to kick off the guest post series.
Beautiful post! I love it.
The part about your daughter getting out of the car with your heart and slamming the door…Kindergarten…ugh…and so many times thereafter.
Loved this post, thank you for sharing it here.
I agree… I can see mine confidently walking into school, waving “Bye mom! Love you!” over their shoulders… as I sat, crushed, in the car amazed at the little human before me. We work so hard to make them independent, and when we realize they are, …
Beautiful post, Danielle!
That is my favorite Elizabeth Stone quote. “To have a child is to decide forever to have your heart walking around outside your body.”
Definitely food for thought.